Road Rage

I am a kind individual. I am warm-hearted, flexible and genuinely caring of other's needs. For the most part, this describes me when I am in relationship with others. Now, there is a point where this is a very untrue statement... the point when I go behind the driver's seat and put on my sunglasses.

Yes, you guessed it, I have road rage, sigh.... the secret's out. I don't know what it is about being behind the wheel of a car with sunglasses on that makes me feel so invincible. I would never call someone a dingbat, moron or dipwad to their face, yet somehow I find those words coming out of my mouth when faced with a person who forgot to use their turning signal, isn't turning fast enough or just shouldn't be turning right at that moment! in my humble opinion of course...

 The very sad commentary on this subject is that it isn't lost on me that my children are picking up on my vernacular whilst they ride along with me from place to place.... and do I stop my nonsense? Nope, I continue to run my mouth. My children correct me and let me know that my words "aren't necessary" or that my comment was "inappropriate" sounding very much like a recording of my own voice as they ever-so-gently and respectfully try to let me know that I need to just hush up. Why do I continue? There are reasons to stop:

1. I'm a believer and not supposed to behave this way.
2. I'm setting a poor example for my children.
3. I could hurt the other drivers' feelings. How would I feel if I realized they knew me?

All of these are wonderful reasons and I have recited them to myself again and again and again. However, what happens when another motor vehicle operator does something  that gets on my nerves? My mouth instead of my engine goes into full gear! Why do I do this? Why don't I just hush up? Why do I contradict with my behavior what I'm trying to teach my children with my mouth? Hmmm...

"For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. "

Romans 7:19-21

Gives me a little comfort to know that the Apostle Paul, such an amazing man of God struggled with the same principle of our sinful nature! God used him so mightily and yet, he struggled with the flesh just like this average Joe here. God's Word is so full of examples of imperfect people who struggled all their lives with their fleshly, sinful nature and yet, they are some of the most beautiful examples in the Scriptures of a life completely devoted and a heart that followed hard after God.  I have to say the encouragement he wrote by the divine inspiration of the Holy Spirit says it so much better than I ever could.

I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question? The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions..." Romans 7:24-25a (The Message / emphasis mine)

There's hope for me yet! :0)